SIS.L

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LITTLE LIFE UPDATE.
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A lot of things have happened since I last opened up my heart here. I have become closer to the people in my life and enjoyed my own company. In November I started on a diet and began swimming. Surprisingly it turns out I do enjoy some sport after all and that I am actually quite good at it as well! My current best swim is 1,2km in 38 minutes. This, and the diet have helped me to lose 6kg so far! I am very proud of myself for these achievements and can’t wait to be more comfortable in my body! I can feel that I get a bit more confident every day!

In mid-December I had a bike crash due to frozen breaks. My trusty second-hand bike, Ruth, let me down and it resulted in an evening well spent at the hospital as well as a very bruised leg, face and eye, a small head injury and a bruised spine. I spent a week in bed sleeping all the time and then headed home to Denmark to be taken care of over Christmas. Living alone isn’t always nice when stuff like this happens but luckily I had help from my friends.

A week before this, my sister came to visit me for the first time and fell in love with the graphics BA at Kingston University. So she decided to apply and will be hearing back soon. Matt has also been applying for universities in the UK as well as Mie’s boyfriend. It could end up with everyone in London soon. Exciting times are ahead. I am so very proud of them all!

Uni has been going on for a couple of weeks now and it is very interesting to be working on my own. A lot more pressure is on me now. Pressure from myself really. I will admit it hasn’t been easy all the time. I will share more of the project when I am done with the design phase this week. I have already planned a few posts and will be publishing them soon.

Hope all is well and that you are happy!
Love from me

2017 was the year where I…
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Here we are, a new year has started and I am looking back on 2017 with loads of memories! Thank you, for another wonderful year! Seemed like yesterday that I was home celebrating my mums 50th or even just moving in to our apartment even though that was in 2016. I am endlessly grateful to have had so many special people to share the special moments, daily highlights, and life stories with. The friendship, love, kindness, and support that I have received last year, has meant that I have dared to do much more! 


2017 was the year where I…

  • celebrated new year alone with Matt
     
  • had 2 foot operations
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  • handed in my application to universities in the UK
     
  • went to Lund university and Edinburgh university to look at the courses
     
  • gave my sister her first tattoo - even matching
     
  • went to the interview at Kingston University
     
  • stranded in England because of a storm, ended up in Newcastle with Matt’s mum and sister
     
  • Got accepted to my dream BA Product & Furniture Design at Kingston University
     
  • met Erin for the first time and got myself a very close friend
     
  • worked a ton for WAWA and watched the brand grow
     
  • celebrated big birthdays and graduation of my sister
     
  • had a lot of guests and dinner dates in our home
     
  • spend a lot of time with my family
     
  • moved to England again
     
  • started living on my very own
     
  • got into a long distance relationship again
     
  • started university
     
  • got so many new friends
     
  • became more creative and started woking on projects
     
  • learned to appreciate every moment and be thankful to the people around me



I cherish each moment of last year and thank everyone for being there for me and with me! 

2018, let’s go!

HELLO FROM MY NEW HOME.
 
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this is the first weekend I have had time to think about anything else other than a long to-do list of stuff I needed to sort out regarding moving or school. 

I am sat in my bed, the bed I had no idea how felt 3 weeks ago when I still lived in Denmark. The bed feels comfortable and so does my new room and my new home. I feel at home in my tiny room in my shared student accommodation flat. What seemed so scary before hasn’t been scary at all. But of course, I have redecorated it so it now suits my need of neutral colours. The past three weeks have been crazy! I have met so many new and amazing people even gotten myself some amazing acquaintances I can call my friends. The university has started and I am right in my element! I have even seen Matt twice since I moved and will see him soon again and I haven’t even felt sad either. 

I need to get into a routine before I can start making regular blog posts again though. Everything is still very sporadically and spontaneous but I just wanted to check in and tell you I am happy!

FACTS ABOUT MY MOVE.
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I have not shared with you the facts about my move, where I will live and when I will actually move so I thought I would mention everything in one big post. 
 

  • I will be moving on the 14th of September and will have 4 days to settle down before starting my introduction week at Uni on the 18th.
     
  • I will be living in Student Accommodation 5 minutes away from campus and will be living with 2 girls, one from Norway studying radio journalism and one from south London studying biological science. I have my own toilet and bedroom and will be sharing the kitchen with the two girls.
    I have decided to live in student accommodation because I need to have a secure base and know how the real estate market in London works or rather doesn't work. It is also the best way of making new friends and get a good new network.
     
  • Matt will help me moving in and will be staying with me until I start uni. I have decided that this will be the best thing for me to have an easier transition. Also, Matt is such a big part of my life, so I might as well just let everyone know who he is!
     
  • The bedroom is tiny and will be fully furnished, I am not allowed to hang anything on the walls or to move the furniture around. This scares the shit out of me but I will make sure to make it as homely as possible. I am thinking about making a before and after blogpost, just so I can help others in the same situation as me.
     
  • I have already planned a trip to Ikea as the first thing when I get to London. Ikea will be the best I can do with a student budget until I will make my own furniture soon.
SELF-CARE AND TAKING MYSELF SERIOUSLY

Something that I have really come to realise after deciding to go to university and move to England is that it is the first thing I have done completely and utterly for myself and my own future. 
I know that this is one of the reasons why I am constantly still freaking out. It is, of course, a mix of me being scared about the next thing that is gonna happen in my life, and that it is something uncontrollable. that is a big fear of mine anyway. not being in control. 

But there is something else that I am scared about as well and that is actually to think about myself and what makes me happy. I am the person who will always think about how other people feel, and adapt myself to the situation. even if it is the smallest things such as going to dinner some place and not wanting to tell people I cannot eat their food because of allergic reasons. I have always done what is better for the people around me than what is good for myself. Because I don't want to cause a scene or to be annoying or irritating. 
It was the reason why I as a 13-year-old vegetarian, stopped being a vegetarian because I felt bad about saying no to the food other people had taken their time to make for me. So I started eating meat again and didn’t even like it. I have the same thing now with gluten. I literally feel physically bad after having eaten something with gluten in even a couple of days afterwards, yet I can never say to the people I hang out with, be it my friends or family, that I can’t eat what they are eating. I just go along even though it is my own fault I get a terrible stomach ache afterwards. I literally would rather cause myself physical pain than saying no to eating stuff with gluten in because that is easier and then I am not being selfish or rather I am totally ignoring myself and don’t take my suffering serious. 

I don’t take myself seriously.

Here are some examples; I have only just recently started taking more selfies whereas before I couldn’t take pictures seriously either. Taking pictures with others is hard as well because I will always goof around and not be serious. I don't do solo singing because I can’t take it seriously even though I have been professionally singing in a choir for 13 years. I can’t practice singing in a serious way when I am alone because it is too intense and then awkward because I don’t accept that it is something I am good at and therefore don’t take myself seriously again. 
Last week I was hoovering while Matt went grocery shopping and I put in my earphones and turned up the music so I couldn’t hear the hoover or myself singing and I just danced and sang as loud as I could. And I remembered that this is the reason why I love listening to loud music in a car and singing along. Because it is so freeing and you can’t hear me singing but I can take myself seriously for a moment and actually practice. 
I have never done something I have been proud of because I don't let myself be proud. Because there is no point in taking myself seriously other people are more important.  

So to start uni and study something with the sole reason of making myself better at it and to choose to live alone in a different country is a path that is only MY path. And it is the first time I have chosen to take myself seriously. And THIS is the reason why I am scared. Because I am pushing myself out of my comfort zone of being altruistic and to be more selfish. I need to be more selfish! I was so scared, and am still scared, that I wanted to stay in Copenhagen only to be with Matt and do nothing else than being with him. Because that is the easiest thing I have ever done. Caring about him and pushing aside the need to actually be caring about myself. Matt said no to me staying for that reason. He wants me to think about myself. And I completely agree. I need to think about myself. 

The blog post about the 4 things I am going to do when I live alone is only some of the more superficial yet very important things I need to learn to do. I also need to dig further into myself and start to let myself do things I like and love as well as taking myself more seriously. 
Studying my dream course, living without Matt is the start of taking myself seriously because I have let myself study something I have always been interested in. I do have the drive to do something I am interested in. And I can make myself proud. I can become successful because I will learn to make myself important and take myself seriously. 

I can do this.